“Wow, you’re so damn lucky to be a student at VSSUT!” Yes, it used to be a proud moment for us when this is what we used to listen from our relatives, friends or maybe the inner conscience (that damn fool!).
Little did we know that the branch we were choosing was bestowed upon by the devil king himself for the sin we were going to commit, not that it matters now… maybe and probably. These are the 11 demonic commandments of our institute, today known as branches of VSSUT:
- ARCHITECTURE– They can literally be considered as the foundation of the varsity. Be it SAMAVESH or VaSSaUnT, if you don’t involve this commandment, you don’t have done the decoration right, and yet they are rarely seen, they do not get much attention. Some precious introverts they really are!
- CHEMICAL– They are the wizards of the varsity. These are basically the entire fandom of “Breaking Bad” learning to brew… well, stuff. And hence, mostly indulged in their own research. With their all practical being in theory, they brew their magic chemicals into nothingness! The first flower bloomed and to have endured the blistering environment so much in this hell and most felt vibes (yeah that was sarcasm!), they do not ponder upon other works and are completely into their own!
- ELECTRONICS AND TELECOMMUNICATION– They are the Satan themselves! For they have endured the unbearable cold hearted eyes of the faculties and scorching and blistering lab uniform rules. They get the best of both worlds, so they chill it out and take it slow. In the battle of core and software placements, these guys are the real winners. And yet continued to be a cool branch! And you thought you have seen it all!?
- CIVIL– Even after following the footsteps of the world famous Civil Engineer, ‘Bob the Builder’, they are nothing better than the dragged souls in the Hell! Be it marks, be it labs, be it theory classes, this branch students are treated as souls to be punished! Their faculties being “mitthi churi” are talented enough to manipulate minds. What greater punishment can a student get than to attend classes on Valentine’s Day and Mahashivratri? You decide!
- ELECTRICAL and ELECTRONICS– The only branch chained between the Hell and the Earth! They just couldn’t decide between Edward(EE) and Jacob(Electronics) and decided that they love both, because mayhe they aren’t pure blooded ETCians nor EEians. Their faculties either expect much from them or nothing. Accepted by none, they continue to wander about this sacred land in order to search for an existence. Ouch!
- COMPUTER SCIENCE– The geekiest students, unwanted children of the varsity, their department is thrown off from the main building, almost as if a child is given away to a foster home. Usually used as the “dumping” site after all the branch fests’ lunch, they don’t get what they need the most for themselves, i.e., proper internet. Now that’s something really sad!
7.INFORMATION TECHNOLOGY– Having entered newly into this realm after being separated from its sibling, CSE, they are like the reservation category without any privilege provided. Their journey to find their own meaning is still on progress, even to find their academic integrity. Their faculties are yet to move on from the breakup of their departments. Kind of hurts, doesn’t it?
- MECHANICAL- It’s the branch dreamed by most, and regretted by the so called fortunates. They can gear up anything in a machine, but fail to improve their own life’s dynamics. The more prosperous it seems from outside, more shallow it is from the inside. Now who does ED for 4 years straight! Well machine design, tool design but all follow the same bloodline right?
9.ELECTRICAL- The branch students here have to go through several trials in order to set up their existence in this place. Their lives went away with only fiddling with the Flintstone’s era electrical machines and wires and getting their hearts strangled into. Even if they are thought to be advantageous, they aren’t in any way. Shocking, aye mate?
- METALLURGY and MATERIAL– Their lives will end by atoning for their sins, what they call as “polishing sample with sand papers”. They dwell within their labs to complete all their works, all the time, even in the summer days. With their lab assistants being sophisticated sadists, they might get trapped in their furnaces’ hellfire. Do pray!
- PRODUCTION- The ruler of the commandments! They are the coolest among all other branches. They don’t have to run after marks, marks “jhakk marke unke paas aati hai”. Like an odd among all odds, the Head is the varsity’s god. Their branch is really productive! Need I say more?
United by water scarcity and immense love for the administration, and divided by… well everything else, the different branches in the University are all peculiar in their own way. But, we all VSSUTians, at the end of the day, are condemned to love and hate this University just the same.