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VSSUT’s V-S-S-U-T Breaking News!

          Screw the India-Pakistan war. For once, obliviate the difficulties the nation is facing right now. We’ve got a whole new situation beating the shits out of our existences in an engineering college. “Engineering demands survival”, they say. VSSUTians have somehow learnt to completely relegate several fancy feelings of the world like jubilance, exultance, flamboyance, relief and ardour. Thanks to the towering authority of the institute, who’s constantly at war with the students over almost a year! The students have drained their butts out with disinteresting strikes though, but maybe the authorities love walking upon a carpet designed out of the dead jollies of its students. Words like ‘Anushasan’, ‘Parampara’ and ‘Pratishtha’ have risen to fame, while words like ‘scheme’, ‘hard’ and ‘khelaw’ have drowned down with shame! From the VaSSaUnT 2018 third day menace to ‘no boys before girl’s hostels’ to ‘no branch fests, no more farewells, no bikes’, the glory of VSSUT has always been the favourite of local newspapers and local meme pages. Welcome to the chronological list that graphs our upward inclination towards DEMORALISATION.

  1. THE VASSAUNT 2018 THIRD DAY MENACE:

How can one forget the darkest day of any cultural fiesta in the history of an engineering institute? ‘11 March 2018’ is still like a reoccurring nightmare. The authorities put their first flag in the hole by asking, “What is the need for a cultural fest in a technical institute?” The authorities annihilated the hopes of thousands of students for the first time ever. ‘Disrespect’, ‘shame’ and ‘trolls’ behaved as bullshits before the authorities, but the students died from within every single day since then. After the cancellation of the 3rd day of VaSSaUnT 2018, a lot of things changed. The institute remained nothing like before. Even consoling words and ma9ical memes in social media couldn’t heal the pain.

  1. GIRLS NOT ALLOWED TO TALK TO BOYS ON THE ROADSIDE:

‘01 Dec 2018’ projected another arrow from the bows of the authorities dedicated to the hearts of the ones who believed, they study in a co-ed. No less than a foreshock it was when the authorities decided to give us lessons of discipline with invisible moral and logic by warning the boys to not loiter around the girls’ hostels, failing which ‘stricter’ actions are on the way. Once again, VSSUT became the subject of trolls in the esteemed columns of the local media and the students got ashamed to discuss this brainlessness in their WA groups before their friends studying peacefully in other institutes. And the authorities didn’t give a damn like always. Maybe the proverb, “Look before you leap!” was not just meant to be taught in every school… (hope you get it)

  1. RUMOUR THAT SAC IS OPENING SOON:

Humor me with the rumor that KFC is coming to Burla, I’ll believe. Humor me with the rumor that Microsoft is coming to VSSUT, I’ll think of believing. But the very ironically named VSSUT ‘Students’ Activity Centre’ (SAC) is opening soon is just beyond the myth that VSSUT’s authorities are the 2nd parents of its students. The Biju Patnaik e-Learning Centre has proved to be a center where cows have learned to design their dung cakes. So the story goes like.. One fine day some students on the roadside found the lights inside SAC lit. This lit their expectations that SAC is going to open soon. That evening perceived WA stories giving the same rays of hopes to each VSSUTian. Sadly, it was a prank call. We all hope that someday in this millennium, the revered authorities grant us the auspicious opportunity to prove the worth of our activities instead of providing the same to the cows, for which we shall always remain grateful… (No pun intended, I swear!)

  1. THE VSSUT HACKATHON MENACE:

Wondering what happened? I’ll tell you. ‘Gurukul’ happened! No offence to the decision of our honorable VC sir, to conduct a 3-day hackathon. You heard that right! A 3-day hackathon (nights excluded)… Funny, isn’t it? Until now, only our hopes and happiness were murdered. ‘It was the turn of the guest participants to visit our institute!’ Hats off to the coordinators who handled the situation very wisely and without letting the aspirations of the contestants down, VSSUT HACKATHON swiftly transmogrified into the VSSUT INNOBUZZ. The event was a grand success. The point is, somebody doesn’t want things to go smoothly at all. Of course, it’s not Karma! Comment in the section below, if you find it…

  1. THE BIKE STUNT MENACE:

Blown away by the excitement of watching live bike stunt in the campus on the eve of 16 Feb 2019, the crowd had already begun to grow exuberant as the stunts began. What could have been more unfortunate over there than a biker going off track and smashing the mob and badly injuring some of the students? But nothing sort happened, yet, the very concerned VC sir (honor be upon him) pulled the stunt out, exactly like a father would have done to his children watching WWE before yoga classes! No offence to the mob, but I ‘personally’ and ‘literally’ respect the decision. (P.S.: puns were never my forte!)

  1. LOCKS AT THE MAIN GATES OF KRATU AND ATRI:

I know our seniors reading this article must be laughing at us! Yeah, alright. Have fun! But don’t cry while I tell you that we’ve seen worse than you had! With due respect, I beg to state that our institute happens to be an environment-friendly zoo. Dogs can enter the halls of residences. Cows can enter the campus area. But girls cannot leave their halls after 6 pm and now boys are going to feel the same pain after 10 pm. There’s more to add as spice to this delicacy. Our very delicious ‘Night Canteen’ is no more ‘night canteen’. Deepest regards for ‘Kailash Da’! The reason for such a responsible act is still unknown. But I believe it must be for the best of the students if our honorable VC sir has taken the decision!

  1. THE ‘NO MOTOR VEHICLE’ RULE:

In some ways, VSSUT is going to resemble IIT Kharagpur in the next 10 days. At least we’ve extracted some good qualities from them. Instead of bikes and cars, students can prefer bicycles (no offence to the ones who come from Sambalpur or Hirakud). According to the notice put up on dated 27.02.19, no student is allowed to enter the University campus with vehicles (physically challenged ones have a special quota, of course). Moreover, within 15 days from the drafting of this notice, the ones with bikes are supposed to sell them to somebody…anybody
(JUST KIDDING!!!).

  1. THE ‘NO DEPARTMENTAL FESTS’ RULE:

True to the best of my knowledge, the authorities asked, “What is the need for a cultural fest in a technical institute?” in point #1. And I thought NaMo was a hypocrite! Gone are the ‘Acche Din’ for VSSUTians. Feels like there’s nothing left in here. I’m so leisured that I’m typing this shit even with a bleeding hand. You’re so leisured that you’re reading this crap with a bleeding eye!

  1. THE ‘NO FAREWELL’ RULE:

Another breath-taking revelation for us and a ground smashing achievement for the authorities is that the last line of the same notice also opened ample opportunities for amicable words like ‘kicked out’ instead of ‘fare thee well’ in VSSUT. I’m still trying real bad to seek logic behind this notice. No no no…never can the decision of the authorities prove to be hampering the students’ cheerful lives in this institute. There has to be a reason. This is definitely not working. Where can I find logic? Oh yeah. I left one place- beneath my shoes. I’ll go and check. You stick to the article…. (P.S.: My mom never taught me the meaning of a pun)

  1. RUMORS ABOUT THE TIMING OF VASSAUNT 2019:

Haters of the authorities have somehow managed to pull a trick by making all the students believe that VaSSaUnT 2019 will be a 3-day fest (literally). I mean, from 9 am to 6 pm. So, the girls have started to return their precious dresses purchased online. The boys have their own plans for the nights (they always have one). ‘DJ night’ will soon be called as the ‘DJ noon’ and students are going to enjoy the prickly heat. Hostel dance, ramp walks, etc will be history and we, the new future. But I believe this is a serious joke…an amazing prank somebody has played very cunningly from behind the curtain. I trust the authorities. They would never do that. I mean, never has it ever happened in any institute. Hence, I urge you to not follow WA stories. Instead, stay tuned for more such truest stories only with Team ViSSion @thevission.org.

This is me signing off. To be honest, the article may have been narrated in first person singular voice but, the voice is everyone’s. The pain is everyone’s. The institute is everyone’s. We respect and care for the legacy our seniors left behind for us. We too wanted to live the same legacy and offer a better VSSUT to our juniors. Unfortunate events, however, repel the authorities from the students. This ‘decision gap’ needs to be filled from both the sides. And me? I’m that idiot who thinks the pen is still mightier than the sword!!!

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Juned Akhter

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  • Soon we will have Uniforms, complete with a tie and belt with the University’s logo. Have yagya aarti instead of fests and morning prayers in the OAT. And the uni name will change to Chaudhary’s Gurukul and ashram

  • This is some serious moral attack on VSSUT. Someone behind the screen is directing the play (I think). Because all of these activities like scripted ones and precisely scheduled . All these to down the accelerating achievements of students. Manifestation of Nothing.

  • First year
    1.lifts are never switched on
    2.hostel nd washrooms are always dirty
    3.meals are too poor
    4.newly generator inaugrated by respected VC sir is never switched on
    5.poor instruments at college(made in 1956)
    6.classrooms are lyk dharamsalas
    7.cows dogs nd their dungs shit are very common
    8.evening snacks for girls only.(as if boys dont require)
    9.some faculty need to pass a teaching test every year
    10.school functions are more intresting than fests here
    I think these points should be considered..rather then some silly issues

Bulletin

  • GANDHI JAYANTI

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